Maybe you are thinking of divorcing your spouse on the ground of adultery. It is really a painful experience and feeling to discover one’s spouse cheated on you. If it were a onetime thing, like a one night stand (as they call it), it might be pardonable; but doing it continually with one person or different persons for a period of time, that is a deliberate act that demands the hammer. It is an affront on the innocent partner’s fidelity to the marriage oath.

The guilty party may tender a heartfelt apology, claiming he “fell” unknowingly, or that he “didn’t know what came over him”; or that he just cannot control himself – it’s just in his nature. That’s really nonsense talk. The innocent spouse could as well become even worse in promiscuity than the guilty spouse. What would be the excuse? Certainly, that the other spouse became entwined in uncontrollable adultery.

Often, the guilty ones cannot withstand the other spouse commit the same sins. Like the Bible says “whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12).

Conclusion? If your spouse doesn’t want you to commit adultery, he shouldn’t have committed adultery. It’s that simple. Adultery hurts. Cheating your wife/husband breaks the love and bond between you.

More often than not, in this part of the world, women are the innocent party. It is generally believed, by men and women alike, that it is normal for a man to commit adultery (although they don’t usually call it that), whereas it is totally abominable for the woman to sleep with another man.

The Matrimonial Causes Act makes no distinction between male and female in marital matters. It refers to couples as “parties” to a marriage. Although, it recognises that only male and female can come together to form a marital union, when it comes to conjugal rights and divorce, there is no distinction. The Act is neither impartial to the man nor the woman. So, if the male spouse commits adultery, the female can sue for divorce, and vice-versa. It is her right to do so.

Suing the Guilty Party

The Matrimonial Causes Act makes adultery one of the facts for the ground of divorce:

“The court hearing a petition for a decree of dissolution of a marriage shall hold the marriage to have broken down irretrievably if, but only if, the petitioner satisfies the court of one or more of the following facts… that since the marriage the respondent has committed adultery and the petitioner finds it intolerable to live with the respondent.”

MCA, Section 15(2)(b)

It is very rare for the courts granting a divorce solely on the fact of adultery. The fact is not often pleaded, and even when pleaded, there is not enough evidence to prove the adultery. For, how exactly does one prove that a spouse has committed adultery without hard evidence, like photos, or videos? It is difficult indeed.

The few times that adultery was found by the courts in Nigeria to have been proved, circumstantial evidence was used, usually in this form: that both parties were seen together, holding hands, or going into a hotel together. That is why circumstantial evidence may no longer be tenable in today’s world.

Best Evidence

The best evidence to prove adultery, therefore, is real or hard evidence. This is evidence that is definitely and decisively true and cannot be questioned by anybody. Pictures are not all that very reliable in today’s technological world as proof. It is very possible for a picture to have been doctored.

However, video shoots from hidden cameras cannot be easily disputed. It shows the real life image and act of real life personalities. Even a “hardened liar” would find it difficult to dispute it. Technology has, again, made evidence gathering by hidden cameras less tedious through the use of everyday objects like wall clocks and writing pens embedded with minute cameras. These items can be placed in the location where the sinful act is likely to be performed by the guilty party.

Another way to get hard evidence is to employ private investigators to ascertain any hunch that you have. It is very expensive, but it is better late than never.

In summary, it is not sufficient to have a hunch that your spouse is committing adultery; you need to have real or hard evidence. If doing this might be emotionally unbearable for you, then consider another route.

Articles on this site are meant to provide general knowledge on divorce law in Nigeria and do not, by any means, substitute for proper consultation with legal experts.�Need help? Go Here!