In this part of the world, couples are often said to marry into the families of each other. Although, intended or not, this often leads to unsavoury in-law interference in the marital affairs of a couple. Sometimes, in extreme cases, it could lead to marriage failure.

There must be a way to stem this tide, particularly with regards to marriages contracted under the Marriage Act.

Restitution of Conjugal Rights is a relief provided for in the Matrimonial Causes Act. It allows a spouse to sue the other in court for resumption of cohabitation and matrimonial responsibilities. This relief is particularly necessary in cases of in-law interference in marriage. It is a way to notify in-laws to mind their own businesses.

A True Story

Man marries woman under the Marriage Act. After marriage, man and woman cohabit in man’s house as husband and wife. Two months into marriage, husband unfortunately loses job, partly due to debt incurred for exorbitant marriage expenses. Nevertheless, he manages to meet his wife’s needs.

Wife gives birth 9 months into marriage. The wife’s mother moves into matrimonial home to perform postpartum (afterbirth) care for her daughter and the newborn. The husband is struggling to care for his family, and now with his mother-in-law present, it’s harder. Mother-in-law expresses disaffection with husband’s lack and shows disgust. Wife begins to complain. This continues for about a month.

One day, husband returns home and discovers that wife and mother-in-law have moved out of the matrimonial home, taking the baby. He was never informed. He notices that some of wife’s clothes have been taken and all of the baby’s things. He calls wife to find out what happened. But mother is the one to respond that, they have moved out to allow him “sort himself out.” Husband visits in-laws, complains about the stealing away of his family, but in-laws accuse him of mistreating his wife. Husband is bewildered: when exactly did he mistreat his wife? They refuse to release his wife to him. Husband walks away dejected.

The couple never live together again. Few months after the unsavoury incident, husband leaves for overseas. Although, the couple still try to keep touch under the circumstances, distance soon had its stole. After a couple of years, husband hears that wife had divorced him. Of course, husband also remarries.

End of story.

……………………………………………………………………………………

There are many couples living apart today because of in-law interference. Sometimes, the spouse who leaves the matrimonial home does not intend it, but is only kowtowing to the wishes of his/her parents, like in the story above. Some persons would rather obey their parents than listen to their innermost desires to live peacefully with their spouses.

Question: Is there something that the innocent spouse can do to salvage the situation, before it degenerates into an outright breakup of the marriage?

Answer? Yes. Amid a myriad of probable solutions, there is a very potent solution that’s often neglected by marriage counsellors and lawyers.

The Neglected Solution

Many spouses think that the only time to see a lawyer is when they need to sue the other spouse for divorce, custody of their children or maintenance. These are not the only reliefs provided for under the Matrimonial Causes Act.

In the story presented above, the husband had the option of suing the wife and mother-in-law, demanding for the immediate restitution of conjugal rights from his wife, and (probably) ask for damages against the mother-in-law for trying to destroy his nascent marriage.

Basically, the Matrimonial Causes Act allows a spouse deprived cohabitation and his/her rights under the marriage to petition a court to order resumption of cohabitation and restoration of conjugal rights with the other spouse. Section 47 of the Act says specifically that:

A petition under this Act by a party to a marriage for a decree of restitution of conjugal rights may be based on the ground that the parties to the marriage, whether or not they have at any time cohabited, are not cohabiting and that, without just cause or excuse, the party against whom the decree is sought refuses to cohabit with, and render conjugal rights to, the petitioner.

Restitution means “to return property to the owner or person entitled to possession”, while conjugal rights means “The rights of either spouse of a marriage, which include the right to the other’s consortium (company), cohabitation (sexual intercourse), and maintenance during the marriage.”

(Elizabeth A. Martin, ed., A Dictionary of Law, 5th Edition (Oxford, Great Britain; Oxford University Press, 2003), 105)

These definitions presuppose that the innocent party is entitled to the other’s company, cohabitation, sexual intercourse and maintenance. That is why it is called a right. It is a duty that the other party, whether willingly or unwillingly, is depriving the innocent party of. This right is what the innocent spouse seeks to be restored.

The preconditions for seeking restitution of conjugal rights from the other spouse are simple enough. The innocent spouse must have sent a letter requesting restoration of cohabitation to the other spouse and the other spouse must have refused to resume cohabitation. He must also show that he is sincerely ready and willing to accept from and perform conjugal rights to the other spouse. (section 49)

Articles on this site are meant to provide general knowledge on divorce law in Nigeria and do not, by any means, substitute for proper consultation with legal experts.Need help? Go Here!

How to Deal with In-law Interference in Marriage


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